By Mr. Badger (mbadger@es.co.nz)
The way to peace and harmony is to be an arrogant bully with the sense of etiquette a raging bull elephant would turn its nose up towards. Strength is the means of control, your own and others. If you find weakness in yourself or others it must be destroyed, through sarcasm or a smack on the head. With Unlife before you there is no reason to deny yourself: drink, vomit and drink again. You're a Vampire so of course there should be blood in it! Do what the inner voice tells you to: feed till you can feed no more, then feed again to show what you're made off. Someone gives you trouble, hit him and hit him hard. Strength is the only judge of respect. Everyone else are just 'girls.' Put your money where your mouth is and you'd better be ready for a fight.
10 | Failing in anything. |
9 | Requiring thought before action. |
8 | Grooming. |
7 | Using efficient communication. |
6 | Refusing to act for reasons like it's 'dangerous/unhealthy.' |
5 | Showing tolerance toward those who are 'different.' |
4 | Doing anything the 'easy' or 'common sense' way. |
3 | Solving an issue with words when hitting someone/something would work just as well. |
2 | Showing unBloke like emotions like fear, pity, remorse, angst, etc. |
1 | Not mentioning your genitalia as often as required. |
System: Followers of the Path must make mention or touch their genitalia at least once per Scene. If the opportunity to make a lewd reference arrives then it must be undertaken without delay. As the Path becomes stronger in a person he gains confidence in his actions. A notable master of this Rank, known as the fiend, can manifest an aura of 'lewd reference.' As such he need not actually speak but people will always know what he was thinking at the time. Also followers of the Path must inspect their genitalia upon waking for the evening. This is a reflex action of most Blokes and involves a bit of a wiggle with a soothing tone of voice. Failure to make the Gonad check means the Bloke will be operating at -3 Willpower due to doubt and uncertainty.
Sense of Direction: Blokes don't have one, none at all. To let a Bloke navigate is to find all those back streets and alleys who never knew were around the place. Blokes have such a sense of adventure they never manage to get anywhere without adventure on the way. Hence they get lost on purpose and hope to get into a fight somewhere.
Listening: Blokes make great listeners. They can listen to a woman for hours on end like a puppy looking to be patted. Mainly they're look down the women's top and not thinking a damn thing but that's what you get. Talking to a Bloke is best called talking 'at' a Bloke as it's not like they're taking anything into that dark dwelling they call a brain now is it?
Absorb damage: At high ranks of the Path a Bloke may take wounds without penalty. That is if they're real Blokes and not some try hard git who thinks they're tough. Incapacitated? Pah, I'll crawl on my lips and bite your legs off! This ability is given unto a Bloke to offset they're lack of the Dodge skill. A Bloke can't dodge without appearing to be 'faggy' and not wanting to get hurt. There are tales of Blokes having both legs ripped off while misusing a power drill who completed the bungalow and attached garage before healing the damage. Blokes just tape up the injury, if they're a little bit girly, and just carry on as if nothing happened.
Oblivious nature: On the face of it Blokes don't live in the same world as the rest of us. In their own little world they are but God's amongst girly people. As such they miss a lot of the detail hidden in their environment. Blokes hide this by pretending to be deep in thought or drunk. Luckily the latter is quite often true as the former is but a fantasy.
Powering up: After the fifth rank of the Path a Bloke may start to temporarily exchange points of their Mental and Social statistics into their Physical statistic. One point from both is added to the Physical statistic. If this power is used to the logical conclusion, logical for a Bloke that is, they'll soon have big nasty zero's in Social and Mental while maxing out their Physical. If this is the case the Bloke is only capable of charging straight towards the nearest enemy shouting 'Muuuuuuuuuurgh!' or a near equivalent. Take the character sheet off the Player and beat them about the head with it till they repent.